Shag, Baby, Shag.

SEE.48 hours is a precious amount of time. This weekend I had a house guest; therefore, most of those 48 hours were not my own. This fact negatively impacted my movie viewing options. My house guest has standards and a husband. Thus, "Burn After Reading." A no go because the old ball and...I mean spouse has to see it with her. What about "Righteous Kill" or "Babylon, A.D."? Hello. Standards. I know. What can you do? So, after the house guest leaves I wind up watching "The Parallax View." "Why?" you might ask. Well, sometimes I like to see the way we were. "The Parallax View" was a 1974 post-JFK/RFK/MLK political conspiracy movie (back when the genre was fresh and new and untainted by...well...Oliver Stone.) This feature stars Warren Beatty as a small time reporter with an eye for unusual coincidences. I'm sure it was cutting edge at the time. Before Americans realized that these so-called "conspiracies" were just regular old politics in action, and Santa Claus was a crock. (Thank you Mr. Stone.) I'm not here to tell you the plot 'cause I'm simple. And simple people are easily distracted as I was by...Warren Beatty's hair.


Stop laughing. Stop it. I'm being serious here. I watched this entire movie, a compelling political thriller with an entrancing montage sequence that would make a music video director drool; but, all I'm thinking about is Warren Beatty's hair. People are murdered. Boats blow up. The American way of life holds on by a thread, and all I want to know is, "Was his hair just like that naturally or did they use curlers?" "How long did it take to get his hair like that if they did use curlers?" "Was that hair standard for the seventies or did they design it specifically for his character?" Did this hairdo prompt the idea for the movie "Shampoo?" Seriously, I was mesmerized for the entire movie. Unable to focus on the plot for all the hair (or is it the forest for the trees?). Watch "The Parallax View." You be the stylist/judge. Oh, and let me know if you figure out what the Parallax Corporation is and why they do what they do. I should get some educational value from this experience. EAT. I couldn't eat. I was too distracted by the hair. SHOP. I believe the style Mr. Beatty sports in this movie is a super shag. Yeah, baby. You can go to http://www.georgecarroll.com/ for detailed instruction on how to obtain Warren's modern look as well as view photos of his previous looks. But why bother with the current 'do?! To get his mind-boggling (but sexy) 1974 look just visit http://www.extremewigs.com/ or http://www.trendywigs.com/. Order up the "Shag Man." Let's hope it only refers to the wig.